Stimming in ADHD, Autism and AuDHD: Why Movement Can Help
It could be the pen clicking before you’ve noticed it. A rhythm you didn’t consciously choose and might struggle to explain if someone asked.
Or maybe it’s your hair. Strands wound around a finger, released, wound again. Perhaps under the table, your thumb moves back and forth across the side of your finger, so small that nobody next to you would see it. Doodles creeping along the margin of the page, shapes appearing on paper until the corner is full.
It just happens, and for some people, things settle a little bit each time it does.
Some of these movements you might recognise. Hands that flap when something is exciting, or too much, or both at once. A fidget toy keeping restless hands busy. A bouncing leg or tapping foot.
Others rarely get called stimming at all. The hair. The fingertips. The doodles. They tend to be explained away as habits or nerves, when they may be doing exactly the same job.
Then someone responds. “Could you stop doing that?” Or “It’s a bit distracting.” Or just a glance at the pen, then at you, then away.
The movement might stop. But the need doesn’t. And now there’s the effort of holding your body quiet, the awareness of being watched while you do it, and whatever your attention was on now drifting further away. The focus shifts to keeping still and this can take much more effort than people see.
It may be assumed that movement like this means something is wrong. It can show up with overwhelm. It can also show up with excitement, concentration, boredom, joy, and sometimes with no discernible reason. For many ADHD, autistic and AuDHD people, stimming helps the nervous system settle itself, wake itself up, or simply enable someone to stay in the room.
Being asked to stop stimming may well be a very different request from the one it sounds like. It isn’t only asking for quiet. It can be asking someone to put down the very thing that’s helping them stay present. Sometimes people won’t be aware that they are stimming at all. But they know what changes when they are asked to stop.
Some people take in more when their hands are busy. That’s not a lack of attention. It’s attention finding what it needs.
If you’ve spent years battling with social expectations to keep still, to look like you’re paying attention, you’re not the only one.
If any of this resonates and you’d like some support in making sense of what you’re experiencing, you’re welcome to get in touch.
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